Gruesome Groin Shot (11/19/14) – Oh yeah, baby… Tie me up!

In a comment about the USA Freedom Act (that was probably more of a Freudian slip), Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell (R) described the legislature as “tying our hands behind our back.”

No shit, Sherlock. That’s kind of the fucking point. The NSA doesn’t need my conversations. If a private company, say Best Buy, keeps track of my shit because I bought a flat screen, it’s because (if I’m a satisfied customer) I’m willing to buy more shit that I don’t need and they want to appeal to my demographic. The profits from my purchase gives their employees a paycheck. I get 40 crystal clear high definition inches that I can watch Sarah Pa…err…Lisa Ann get railed on in the comfort of my home. Everybody wins! The worst they can do is annoy the ever living shit out of me, at which, they lose a customer. And then they start kissing my ass to get me back. I’m not forced to do anything. They don’t give a shit that I texted “Javier” about “an ounce of ‘dro.” But the NSA does. Fuck. Off. 

Somehow representing the same state from the opposite end of the GOP spectrum (don’t ask me how…I don’t know and I’ve lived here for 99% of my life) Rand Paul (R) stated that he also refused to vote for the measure but for different reasons; stating it didn’t go far enough to reel in the domestic spying. Despite a close margin of 58-42, the Act failed to collect the 60 votes needed to clear the Senate. Paul later commented that he regretted not voting in favor, citing that an easy “close enough” is better than a distant “perfect.” (An ironic statement considering many libertarians’ opposition – including my own – to Paul for not being principled enough.)

On a side note, the folks at Anti-War beg to differ on the validity of the Freedom Act; stating that “the bill merely outsources collection to immunized telecoms, compelling them to do the NSA’s dirty work.”

Not strong enough? Outsourcing? Meh… Six of one, half a dozen of the other. Doesn’t change the fact that this is just another speed bump on the highway to axing the heads of the overly intrusive Hydra.


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